A Little Girl

Let me tell you a story of a little girl:

Well, upon a town not very small,
There with her mother lived a little girl,
She, one day, put on her shawl,
And, with her mom, went to the mall.

Upon the escalator at the mall,
While her mom was busy making a call -
The little girl had quite a fall.
And, her mom, unaware of this all, didn't see,
That the little girl had scraped her knee.

The little girl, now in pain,
Tried standing up but in vain,
Every now and then, she'd again try,
But, when it hurt real bad, she started to cry.

When he heard her cry and fall,
There came a man, black and tall,
He said, 'hey,little girl',
'Hush! Don't cry, here take this doll'
And, handed the little girl
A cute little doll

The little girl happy at last
Looked at her mum who walked pretty fast,
She wasn't there and in a haste,
The little girl ran to show her the doll.

But he also hurried outside,
The man; black and tall
And boom went the doll,
And boom went they all,
And not even fingernails remained,
Of that cute little girl.

Above

This night is a silhoutte, I guess,
Waiting for the sun to shine tomorrow,
Beneath the mask of absolute darkness,
Waiting for the light to end the sorrow.

It's all endless wait, I think,
A wish to have something new to see,
Upon every departure of lashes at blinks,
A wish to witness a miracle be.

But, it is all but wish - I fear,
That makes us hope the wait will let us claim it all,
And, bring two such sorry souls so very near,
As we shut our eyes upon this nightfall.

But, I believe,
There is nothing to fret,
There is no need to regret,
Because, as we live,
And, with what priorities we set,
Every evil, we will learn to forget.
And, forgive.

So, shut your eyes and sleep my love,
For, for forever and more if I may,
I will look after you from the stars above,
So you may see the light the next day.

Lucky Me

Pitch darkness this side over,
Faint lights on the other.
All is like a four leaved clover,
Teasing as they go passing by,
One after second after another.

A song on the air,
Cold breeze messes your hair,
Wish I could join the shadows of hope,
Nothing is as sad as it is,
Nothing could be as pensive.
Than the solitude I feel here.

~clap clap clap~ and laugh though,
Mock me and make this go.
Keep me from shivering,
Let me live a life again.
Let me restart from the very beginning.

Gamble

What if?

What if instead of these bloody sweats and endless strife -
We could sit silent side by side,
Watch the sunset and enjoy the night?
Would that satisfy your thirst, oh dear life, to be an audience?
Or, does it mock the definition of your perfect life?

 Glamour means not so much to me,
Do really see a meaning in it at all?
Could you for a moment now, let that be?
Let's just feel the serenity of the nightfall.

What if the birds that fly, up in the sky so high,
Mean, by their fluttering wings, a pensive goodbye?
Then, is it alright to mock them now?
Do you really feel nothing I feel somehow?

What if what we run after - that desired spotlight,
Is what is being offered to us through this cold night?
 Instead of pondering over the losses long ago,
Could you, for a minute now, enjoy the show?
Just sit by me, I will show you what I see so close,
Just sit by me and rest as the the evening grows.

 I promise I will walk you home safe and sound,
Even if there is pitch darkness around.
So, don't worry about it, just feel the sorrow or dismay,
Of the end of life for until the next day.

 What if it was all a show?
I don't know,
Maybe it is,
Maybe it isn't so.
I guess we will never know.

Kryptonite

Light dissolves into the darkness - this day,
A harsh coat of eeriness surrounds us,
Sharp shrills of sheer sorrow and dismay,
And, we fade into the abyss around us.

A wait awaits every night -
A hope of absence, the shame,
With all our might, I fight,
A weakness to miss the us - the same.

Everyday passes as if it never were,
But it was and it's still there.
I feel it and I know you do the same -
You still hear me when I call your name.

The sky above collapses with a creak,
As we depart a pace further,
And, I turn around to peek,
To retain the image a moment longer.

But, you're no longer there,
As if you never were.
And, as I see the love abate,
I assume I was a moment late.

I know you looked back at me,
I didn't see but it was this way.
I was a moment late, a moment unseen,
And, I feel sorry for that 'til this day.

You are my weakness, I don't know how,
But, you will be so for an eternity from now.

Fiery Ashes

It all started with a sparkle - bright but tiny,
And, gloated with the applause - dim but shiny,
It washed all the water,
And, seemed to be only fire that mattered,
But, when the clock struck 11,
It left us cold and shattered.

It is nice to see you move on.
It is nice to see you're doing well on your own.
Over this side, it isn't so,
Very well though,
But as the sparkle dies as it gets old,
It hurts to see that you've grown so cold.

The blueprint worked - a masterpiece I made,
In a sheet of colorful nonsense, tales I said,
And, even though some days you cried,
To sorrow induced or at least I tried,
It rained, and sometimes the rainbows retained -
The essence of joy embedded -
And, slowly, very-so-slowly - the sorrow slowly grayed.

Won't you ever look back at me? Even if just a second more?
Won't you ever look back at me and smile as you did before?
It is nice though - you have understood the cipher,
That, beneath utter hopelessness -
I had to lock the door in a hope to clear the mess.

Maybe, we will resume from where we first started.
And, maybe, in our case,
It won't be as bitter as it is departed.

Take care.

Sweet Sorrow

This isn't about departing,
But, a new starting.

On the verge of being almost broken,
The void clears off the reek.
With the pride outspoken,
Two eyes swore never again to peek,
And the lips - never to speak.

Then, the shadow beneath shone,
As the queen denounced her crown.
The serene collapsed on the omen outgrown,
And laughed still with a faint little frown.

This is all some sort of humor - this night,
Some hilarious joke fate says.
A bruised perfection smiles with delight,
It really is a harsh game life plays,
Deluded, we stray.
All is well that ends that way.
But, we live in the darker shades of grays

Pity, a dire refusal, a vain cruise,
All in all the gambler's choose.
Apologies never said, feelings never shared,
And, even the sweet parts of it were mostly unprepared.

So many words couldn't until tomorrow,
Make you see through me - through my sorrow.
But,
None of this is to reply or to comply,
This is just to repent and to say goodbye.

~cheers to life~

Disaster

I have tried many times to say what I mean,
To tell you what horrible nightmares I have seen,
So that you can lead me from the abyss back to the green,
And, repair me from what a mess I have been.

But, is it the mediocrity so triflous to achieve? I ponder,
What a curse I share with you I wonder,
The tension between us, the glamor and satire,
These ominous words of a pensive attire.

When was the dove better off without a mate?
Where does the sun shine and regret?
And, even the moon is sometimes late,
How can it be that 'that one touch' I can't forget?
So many questions - none a-bit simple then the one above,
So many queries - soon to reflect the cross of verbs,
So, you see - this is not all too much of thoughts I express,
The light radiates from you to this heart of sobs.

Am I pulling you down? Do I make any sense?
Is it paranoia if I am so tensed?
Am I worst than how much I thought I could be?
If I am so, why do you so whole-heartedly refuse to see?

Anguish and pain, torture and gain, juxtaposed I can no longer bear,
The sounds of screams I whisper - the sound of utter fear,
Can it really be that it is all because I am my own master,
That I often end in so much of a disaster?

Can you really save me?
Or will I bring you dismay?
"Otherwise" - you often say,
But, will it really be that way?

Forgive me if it really hurts knowing I can't let you fade,
But, it is the horrible nightmare
You don't have to prepare for,
You are better of without me - please be safe.

More

It had been almost a year,
Since it last was ruled by fear,
Almost a year,
Since they last shed some tears.

They listen to the silence - they want to see,
Silence can't be percieved - by them or me.
The echoes of groans,
Crackling of the bones,
Whispering within the anguish and pain,
Beneath some soft - bloody stains,
They cry for help and for a laugh they can't bear,
For, it had been almost a year,
Since they last shed some tears.

How can the God be so cruel, how can he be so?
How can I despite someone I so much adore?
The blabbers and threats, one less word worth said,
It had been almost a year, since it last wished to be dead.

But, such is life, they say and I know,
And, the drama on the stage is a mere magic-show,
I listen to the silence as the voices disappear,

And, think to myself
How I couldn't stop them
From shedding some more tears.
And,
How I couldn't smile within a fear,
After so many years.

Virtue of Distance

A letter off-a-prose or a petal off-a-rose,
How "the sorrow of departure" their ambiguity shows.
But, the real torture - of a loathed-departure,
In cuts and tears - only a pensive heart knows.

So much was left unseen -
So much we could have been.
Oh, how much away two hearts can stray,
Two love-bird's in one's bad dreams.

Simili in a shade
 as the curtains fall
And, as the words fade,
I wonder "did we have it all?"
When not obscured by the miles - we are obtused in smiles,
The distance elaborates the difference - howsoever small.

I wonder how it will be when we resume,
How it might be once this time is consumed -
Will we be back where we were back then?
Will we have anything we did - ever again?
Ha! Only time will show the results I know - sorrow, I assume.

The Grey Solitude

Realization has made me come this way, (about what don't ask)
And, it is realization that wont' let me stay,
There is an intense desire to keep moving as I can,
Through darkness - pitch black moving as I can.

It isn't entire that I am ruled by sorrow mere,
Nor, it is that I am a mere puppet to fear,
A grieving grief keeps me holding me where I am,
Through darkness - pitch black, holding as I can.

With time - the mighty, every helpless bird flies,
And, with time the absolute, even the deepest care dies,
A failure - depreciating, keeps tripping me off this cliff,
Through, darkness - pitch black, falling off this cliff.

It isn't a song that helps me go to sleep,
Nor, it is the desperation, in me - which I keep,
But a light of hope - hopeful is what keeps me from screaming,
Through darkness - into the light, it's I that keeps me dreaming.
Of a life, a rest, a higher altitude,
A life, other than this gray solitude.

Confusion

The problem I find with life and living as such,
Is not that I miss you at all - but, oh-so-much.
But, when the night sky is clouded and the stars don't shine,
I feel as though the simulation becomes a crime.
I can no longer assess your essence in melancholy - they don't rhyme,

And, when anticipation of distance between us grows on and on from null,
I realize that we - I and you, can never be together - never at all.
Then, out of desperation
I can't help but sing the song so long,
Tap my feet, move my palm and sing all-so-wrong.
At some point I stop,
Abrupt.
Laugh at myself - over the faded streak.

Who knows? Maybe the corporeity will shine you one last time,
And, I will get to witness your elegance - so sublime,
Maybe then the whatever I'd lost once upon a time I might regain,
And, I won't have to all-so-wrong sing again.

We both have to Win

If you want to show your cold-rage soar,
I've got winter just at your door.
If you've got the gentle breeze,
I'll have you smile 'til you cease.

And,
If you want to be alone just for a while,
I'll be off to nowhere - one thousand miles.
If you want to whine about what's lost,
I'll make you hear my bloody complaints first.

See, that's why - there is nothing to fret,
Lets restart the play right from the start.
And, erase the part where we first met,
And, redo - everything as we have but far apart.

Or, lets save the trouble and regain -
The hope that we will be the same again.
You - a better half - anyone can see,
Even able to with-stand someone as useless as me.

All that is here is a cycle - it will repeat forever
Until - in shreds - our world collapses altogether,
Grim as it might be - the abyss pulls us close
Desperation in sight - smiling - with a rose.

See,
There is no difference between us - we are akin.
We just can't bear losing - we both have to win.

Evening

The drops, malformed, sprinkled with air, hit my hair
As if claiming it's not all too fair,
But, who am I to claim I know?
Have I the right to interfere with the show?
Let the drops 'as worse as-can-fall' be
And - glitter on the glow
Fall like tiny flakes of snow
Drop and fall and fade - as gloomy as we.

Why don't we all together,
Watch her cry as if it'd last for-ever?

Why do we have to decide if she's happy or sad?
Or, good or bad?
Let's feel her sorrow tonight - just as how she's had.
I know how this will be every rainy season.
But, do we need to have all those reasons?

Maybe nothing good will come from this,
I know we can just let her be-
cry tears of rain, as if in vain,
I know she'll soon be calmed by the gentle breeze,

But,
For a moment now,
Let's forget all those memorable achievements,
And, all those countless important events,
And, sit long enough to bid her goodbye
And, watch her 'with all he glory' turn into the night.
Let's just sit side-by-side without moving,
Let's just be there for her this evening.

Strike Through

Won't you look at me?
And, for a moment, let-that-be?
You query too much; I deny as much.
That - you mean so much of nothing there is
And, that - you do not mean nothing, I tease.

Fiend, find and feel - the moment still.
Don't you feel the breeze and mist in me?
Don't tell me your heart doesn't beat the race with-all-it-can,
Let the numbers mean as much - do not try-control what you can't.

Look at me, won't you? Stare into my eyes.
You'll see it crystal-clear what I really mean with my lies
So, don't try-evade you know you can't run so-from-me
Look and return, fiend-I-say to the null you in want to be.

Tell you what - I am a-changing you be here or go,
And, this much I will gladly do for so-so.
Hate or love - stare at the sky above,
I'll stay here for-ever
And, I'll wait-for-never

She

She Cares

As vivid as the falling snow,
And - such sublimity, the glow (of care).
Her smiles and cries, you give up a moment, next you try,
She's the one, she's the one who'll be there
She cares. (You can bet)

She looks at you. And, she looks away.
You shake in your boots when she looks your way
Sing and dance, and she gives you a glance
But, brother, understand, you've got-no-chance,
she ain't really there
She cares (ha!)

And, as the music ends, she ceases her bends
And, her message in a cipher she sends
She smiles you laugh. can't take your eyes off her scarf
She's a giraffe, baby - and you're just a dwarf
Don't believe me?

The dance is done, and look - she's gone
Not a number to call, no address, no name
she's gone like a ghost. You're in-sa-ne.
You always were, and you still wish she'd care?
she cares (not!)

Master

The Collage is blurred, perhaps,
Eyes cannot see,
And, my words were slurred perhaps -
But, how can I let it be?
This is no spite I demonstrate,
Neither anguish, or pain. Nor "creed"
But, a fight for you to retaliate -
This is a punishment for all your deed.

So, bow to me, beg on my feet,
Cry for forgiveness, cry and plead,
And, with discretion, I will show you the way,
To never-ending dismay, where you'll sob and stay,
And, decay.

Apologize? I never do. But, I do have a prediction for you:
That you will suffer until the end and all the way through.
And, just as the obscurity we capitalize "I" with,
Upon dark nights, and the stabbing lights,
And every fear or frights
I "will" be there with you.
Just turn-a-round.

A Hundred Thousand Dreams

Stare at the night
and its subtle beauty
the only thing alive here
are the men on duty
you can hear faint sound
sounds of babies scream
covered under the whisper
of hundred thousand dreams

Robert Frost "Revelations"

What good is poetry if we fail to acknowledge the sublimity of others - writers or readers?

This Poem speaks so much about so many of us.

And, for many other reasons, this is one's one of my favorites.

Miss Luck

Hope.
Some mysteries are not to discover,
but kept a secret, forever.

Aphrodite

Goddess in her temple,
queen in her castle
she rules all that you see
she doesn't care,
neither 'bout you nor 'bout me

look at her bend and how perfect is her curve
she's the grand dish 'he' has ever served
shiny short skirt, treats you like dirt.
She's simply gorgeous - try and flirt
let me tell you what'll be:
she will smile and tell you to leave
she's just too pretty for either of us to believe

don't fall for the angel before you
the devil inside will get you - through and through
she's nobody's prize to keep on shelf
she's only to be worshiped day and night
don't fool yourself

see her move and slowly depart
you always knew you'd be apart
so, let her be, her jewel is her vanity
'Tis for good and better - don't even try to get her
save yourself the in-sa-ni-ty

Gray

Blooming, roar - the heavenly theft,
Lightnings - thunders, right and left
The flight cancelled as the birds hide
One law of nature all can, but , abide.
And, a puny creature, underneath I stand
The heavenly uproar, an evening so grand

So many terraces - yet, I wonder how
that I, alone, am in one right now?
Could it be that rest all have been out-of-touch?
And, careless to admire the serenade - glamorous as such?

(Greatness is a majority opinion. So far, the majority always has been wrong - the concept has)

Some Home

So timid and show vivid
Organs, rhythm, the shade of steel
Glitter the rays, that strike upon
And sorrow, the heart, joy it fills

So soft the thicker tuft
Radiate, reflect the adored pride
Simple, mediocre, sophisticated
Confetti, the better bride

Alas! the groom isn't so
Bride, the rest, the self abhor
Filled with agony he struggles on for miles,
As the glamor herself - simply smiles.

So many things are happening here,
So many hearts are being broken,
It's all too obvious - never so fair
But, justice here is mistaken.

And, so, I leave this forsaken land,
At the gates, with utter awe I stand,
And wave it all bye with my dirty hand
In search for some home, forever grand

The time has come

Perhaps, the time has come for the curtains to unveil the show inside.

The useless part of a theater to be used again. Perhaps, the time has come for a new life to resume from the earlier-paused trance. The lights to shine violently over the beauty upon the stage and for the cheers and roses and a bit of stones and hates to shower upon the performance that's about to stage on the stage. A serenade to be performed and flirts and flatters voiced on the show.

An Idyll. A bliss artificial and yet soothing to the heart. A writer's imagination to flourish and the characters in his play to come out of the grave and be alive. A narrator's time to appear from behind the curtains and direct the show as if it were a part of his soul. A heroine to dance and shine and collect the hearts of the audience drooling over her. A hero to ride his horse, climb up the high walls and sing a song of love under her balcony without fearing the canines and the cannibals on his side. A father to accept defeat and retreat from the way of true love and a new Romeo and the old Juliet to be born again.

A new Casanova to reign this foreign substance that is slowly trying to accommodate within 'self' and failing to keep it undistinguished. A pride to subside. Vanity and Chastity to hide and the Courage to venture new lands and give up on the one he couldn't so whole-heartedly acquire. For the brilliance to radiate furthermore as it can and the Passive to die and fall apart. The Adventure to reach new heights and continue above - new dangers to be fought and victories to be sought from the evil-doers to the heart. A new treasure to be discovered and used in every single way to acquire fame and name and true status. Expectations - Great Expectations.

A feeling so vain that it can take no shape other than of a heart that is so unwilling to accept the blood of a lesser being.

A series of rehearsals in front of the mirror and never to be performed live on the show to end. Poems and Plays and Stories and Hearsays. Games of heart, cheesy words of flirt and the dirt of failure and the glitter of success - momentary. The time has come for the curtains to unveil the show inside and for the performance to loot the shower of roses and applauses and stones and scorns of the audience watching the show. The time has come for the men to stand and make the moment grand.

Taking back the words wont be what the heart desires. The body craves are to subside by nights so dreary one can hope but to sleep. Requirements are to be met and the gates are to be opened to let the breeze flow on the level. The nest on the post-box is to be kept untouched - the innocent eyes are to be protected. It's a new world in which there has to be hope and faith and care most of all about everything that matters - self.

The dreams are to be re-seen and the touches to prevail as far as 'self' cares. Lucid ideas that require nothing but 'self' to accomplish. The dreams to furnish and the game to flourish. The time has come for the words to be re-spoken and the ears to be closed for the fear of hearing those shrills are also to be fought and prevented. The game of the mighty is to be taken off and the trophy to be thrown in the gutter where it belongs. Sex and Love to be moved aside and the tranquil to be saved for the other day.

A new deck of cards is to be drawn and the queens kept at last and the kings burnt to ashes. The aces are to be hidden for the game with 'self'. The aces are to be hidden for the games the 'self' claims. And the jokers are to be used as a smoke screen where they only find their use as mere jesters of the show to the queens. The click to retain the scent of the hands that pressed it so soft. The words to be tidied and printed for the world to see and the name to show off. The time has come.

It's now and always.

It is now.

Sweet Retreat

Unrequited - most of it.
The glitter of diamonds. A smile of persuasion and the rhythm of serenade. Happy valentine's day! Perhaps, the flow was suffocating and perhaps, the moment was humorous but the intent of un-harm was uncanny. A heart that contained a heart - so willing, so appreciating, so bizarre. The recipient was more than what words can confide, more than what expressions could confine, more than what the heart could convey. The eeriness was effable, the efface desirable but the perseverance prevalent and yet the divine refusal. The greater on denial and the lesser surprised. What was it that the sole wanted? Why was the cipher misunderstood? Ah well... the deed was done and the message demodulated and delivered. And, that was all that was required, eh? Crippling psychology. Besotted soul.

But, then again, why bother the heart that's bound to bear more than what the sole can share? Let 'it' be. Let it be just the way it wants to be. Protect 'self'. Save the greater the embarrassment - the insult the lesser can cause. Maybe it's time for the sole to seek the soul it hasn't yet sought than to seek the soul that doesn't see to seek the sole on question. Maybe it's time for the misery to end.

Quivering defeat.
Sweet retreat.

The Dreams

The Dreams.pdf